I am sleepy but I have been and done Brighton today (not Saturday as originaly posted) it was nowhere near as painful as I thought and I really enjoyed seeing my friend down there. I admit it was weird being in a place that was once considerd home but with a little time it will again be that same place and especily since I have managed to put a lot behind me with the town.
The one main thing that I was pleased to see again was the sea,the salt air and the crashing waves are a sure way to calm my feelings and sooth me heart.
I sat on the beach with my friend for a while just talking about life,how we got to where we were and where we intend to be.
We didn't know the awnsers to our futures but we both understood what brought us to be in our indvidual situations. In many ways we were/are looking for the same thing but in different ways it was good to learn for each others experence about how we could achive what we wanted.
In terms of releationships we agreed that being single was not as bad as we feared being able to keep your options open to whomever may enter your life is quite exciting.
I did plan on taking my hand fasting ring along with me to throw in the sea as an act to aknowledge that it was time to move ahead with my life but after talking to a friend over the phone I realised there wasn't a need to do that. You can keep your memories and still understand that your life is going foward,so I am going to keep it safe but away from my gaze because I know there will be a time when a warm memory is harmless to look back on.
Another thing I miss about Brighton is the shops,they tend to be eccletic and sell items not found anywhere else,as I am a big fan of note pads (the life blood of my stories) I was pleased to find one shop that sells recylced matrials that are then used for other purposes. I brought a note pad that had it's cover and back made from an old electronic circuit board :D...it looks brilliant and a fantastic addition to my other far more mundane pads.
The weather really wasn't that much to shout about but then the trip was all about making a new friend and starting a fresh I wonderd if the sky was over cast because it was a reflection on clouds hanging over me.
Then it was time to leave and I really didn't want to I wanted to stay but maybe today wasn't the time to do so tomorrow is always going to be there and tomorrow can always be built towards. Now I have goals and targerts,I have a real ambition as to where I want to be and hopefully I won't always be one my own in going foward.
I know it's step by step and after today I feel a have made my way down a road that will give me the life I want.
Thank you to S.W (won't say your name you may not want me to) for listening and being nice company it's great to know that I have a friend near the sea :)